Day 12 of 50 days of summer....i think

So going home for a weekend completely through me off. Computer access wasnt on my mind so I stopped my 50 days of summer trend. The wedding I went to just made me think of how I want mine to be. It was nice to hang out and eat with family. Working on my application is harder than I thought. I dont want to do it most of the time because its tedious. I got some medical books from the library to learn some things about medicine and being a doctor. They are interesting. I want to be ready for interviews.

Day 4 of 50 days of summer

The Ann Arbor Art Fair is underway and every where. There are a lot of sales at local places but the art fair itself is expensive. I thought about buying something but they line was too long and not worth the sale. The biggest thing is that it is so so hot this week. Like 90 plus. I met up with a good friend today and just caught up talking about random stuff from school to life to friends. There are some people that you know will be in your life for a long time. People who arent just characters in a chapter but potentially part of the novel. I love good friends!

I even made dinner today. Cooking in the summer is fun because I have the time but not fun its adding heat to heat. I like doing things when a sudden urge comes to me. It probably gets me most of the stupid problems I have but it always gives me peace and ease at the same time because I am doing what I want when I want.

Day 3 of 50 days of summer

This day was one of the task days. The day I would be very productive. My main thing today was my med school application. The information part,  a lot of typing and rambling about what I have done. The first step at least, next I need to review what I wrote and make it sound legit. Along with the information part I ordered my transcript so that they can tell me how not so good my grades are. But I dont care Im still applying.

Other than my application. I was hot, really hot today!! So I tried to stay out the heat. To top it all off watched some more Prison Break. I am semidetermined to finished the series this summer. Watching series on Neflix is so much better than waiting weekly. But I am mad at Netflix for doubling their price.

Day 2 of 50 days of summer

Everyday I wake up with a goal. Thats the least I can do with myself. Today I wanted to start reading a some book. I kind of have a list of books I want to read for the summer. I think the best knowledge is hidden in books just waiting for someone to informed.

I decided to start with an easy read or more like a past fail. I started The Fire Next Time for the second time. To top it off I started reading it out loud to work on my reading out loud skills. Which I honestly know I am terrible at, but hey at least I know. The book so far is a pretty good book. Its about a man who writes a letter to his nephew about basically being black in America. So there is a lot of truth and hypocrisy in it.

Reading outside on the porch while the cars were passing felt good once the I got used to the heat. I really want to work on listening to the world. Take a step back and enjoy nature.

Plus I started another TV series Prison Break :).

Summer reading...

Day 1 of 50 days of summer

Yesterday after my test felt beautiful. I called up my friend. We ate then I went to the mall to treat myself to some summer dresses. I deserved it. Right? Months of studying came down to a 5 hour test. That will determine the next course of my journey to becoming a doctor. Talk about pressure. But I felt okay. My friends helped take my mind off of the fact that I have to wait a month for my scores by hanging out and just talking. Its really the simple things that make up the beauty of life. After a day filled of relaxing I drove back and got home around 1am. I really wanted to sleep in my bed and wake up in my house. I wanted to feel relaxed and refreshed for the next phase of this season of life.

When I look back at this weekend I will ask myself one question. Why did you clean your room the first morning after your test? My thought, why not? It was looking ridiculous and its hard to enjoy freedom in a mess. So I packed, straightened and got my room going in the right direction to move out in a couple of weeks. (I know that will be a bittersweet day. Not because I love this house, I could care less. Its because my roommates will be moving on to their next steps. Crazy but good.)

I got to watch soccer with some friends today. It was a great game! The FIFA Women's World Cup Final with USA and Japan. (Soccer is the only girl sport that I can watch that doesnt weaken the sport because of the limited ability that girls possess when it comes to athleticism.) The game went to penalty kicks and I must say the US were horrible at it. It was sad. But Japan got a solid win in the end. During the game I thought in the back of my mind how it just felt good to relax and not worry about the sacrifice a moment of fun had when it came to studying for "that one test".

For the 50 days of summer I have a few things planned that will be really sweet. Texas will be a blast and I am really excited to go rock climbing. I want to read more medical oriented and leisure books. I need to fix my guitar string so I can actually play it this summer. I have to learn to play this summer! It sucks that I feel that it is necessary to say I have a guitar but I cant play it.

I met someone today when I went to hang out with my friends. I assumed by the end of the convo that he was a doctor. But he began his post introduction convo basically saying that I shouldnt be a doctor.

1. That was bold considering you are one. So you are saying your unhappy and your not going to change your lifestyle.
2. People have different motivations to be a doctor, different goals, and desired pathways.
3. I respect what you have to say. At least you have the sacrifice to back up your statement. But really?I I think that its really weird to just come straight out and say that. But I appreciate the honesty.

He could have at least just said that you should really take the time to think about why you want to be a doctor and how it will change your life, for the better and worse.

Yes. One of my concerns with becoming a doctor is questioning how I will feel when I become one. What will change and what will be sacrificed but I also think about what will be gained and enhanced because of it. I know with what every I do in life or work to do I will have concerns with whether or not it is the right thing to do or if its what I really want to do. The way I see it, I should at least try and see what happens.


I would rather try and fail then regret and wonder. My happiness will not be dictated by the actions of others but by my actions and respect for what I want in life. My happiness is simply my happiness and has nothing to do with how others feel about my actions. At the end of the day, I am answering to myself. So if I fall I will fall hard on my knees and no one elses. 

Embrace new phases, they are the fuel of life.

50 days of summer

Right now I have this urge to write. I can finally come up for air after putting all my time and energy into the next step of fulfilling my dream. The MCAT. I took it yesterday and felt motivated while I was taking it because I basically knew that I could get my summer back and start lining up the next pieces of my life after I had finished. Luckily, (crossed fingers) I felt pretty good about it. Not awesome. But consistent. It didnt seem like a curve ball, just a straight forward pitch.

So now I want to write. I want to express anything and everything that has been building up or is about to happen. I thought about starting a new blog because it would be like pulling out a clean sheet of paper only internet style but I opted against that. I like used paper, past doodles, and the ease of familiarity.

They (not sure who they are) say blogging tends to have more direction when there is a deadline for something, when there is a reason other than the idea of blogging to just be blogging.

So I gave myself a deadline slash direction.

I have 50 days of summer left, correction I fell like my summer is now beginning so there isnt anything left, there just are 50 days of summer for me. 

My plan is simple. Write everyday for 50 days about my summer. My post MCAT summer. My 50 days of summer "bucket" list that exist but doesnt exist all the time. I have things I want to do and things I will do just not things I feel I have to do before the summer is over. 

Let my summer begin...

Hopefully it is a memorable one filled with good thoughtful insight and interesting experiences.