i fear that the two biggest decisions of my immediate life have risen into the works beyond my control.
Dreams never seem to fall far from the tree...
Evidence Submission 1: I dreamed about the one thing I am "pending" in my current times. I dreamed about my first year in medical school. Pure happiness and unwavering beauty. I dreamed my hard work had paid out. My hope had finally transformed into a dream come true. I loved it. I took that dream with stride and kept the motivation towards such an uncertain goal.
Evidence Submission 2: I dreamed of love. Not just simple love. I dreamed of marriage. Like the wedding. Scary. I know I will get married one day but I NEVER had a dream about it. I woke up thinking "did I really just dream about marriage" I don't even think about that on a daily basis like medical school. But I know when the time comes, the time comes.
Follow up of 1: Hopefully in one year this is a dream come true. Literally! It's always on my mind because I am working towards it. I am, at times, uncomfortable with the uncertainty, but I trust and have the passion to move forward.
Follow up of 2: Yea, I have no idea when this is to come to pass. I don't even have a boyfriend yet. I have friendly relationships with potential, but I never initiate just appreciate. Maybe I should change that. I did think about that tendency a couple days ago, but I didn't think I would dream about marriage like I did last night. What am I suppose to do?
Maybe we keep going in circles, maybe I am making something out of nothing. Maybe I will put a cherry on top of the relationship, maybe I won't, maybe I am scared, concerned, afraid of losing the friendship. Maybe I should be. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. (Reminds me of Marsha, Marsha, Marsha lol).
When it comes to relationships I have too much patience for the maybe and not enough courage to prevent the what if. But life is about putting yourself in uncomfortable situations in order to make progress. But that's a lot of pressure to put on a relationship. It makes NO sense to start a relationship when the notion of marriage! Marriage is futuristic, but maybe love can happen now. In due time...
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